Am I right??
But don’t worry, guys. We’re gonna hustle through this together!
Let me introduce myself. I’m Charish Reid, a romance writer. I skillfully craft soft-core pornography that’s allowed to be sold to the masses. You can read it, your mom can read it, and if you’re feeling especially adventurous: YOU AND YOUR MOM CAN READ IT TOGETHER! Oh god, I wish I had that kind of laid-back relationship with my mom.
Me: Hey mom, whatcha readin’?
Mom: Smut! I’m reading smut!
Me: *recedes from the room because we never talked about sex*
Anywho, I’m going to introduce myself with boilerplate information and then I’m going to transition into some probing nuggets of information!
- Name: Charish Reid
- Age: None of your damn business. Okay, I’m the exact age of someone who wanted a Teddy Ruxpin as a child. Happy?
- Occupation: College educator (an adjunct with no job security to be exact! Hahaha, let’s laugh about the state of higher education! Let’s laugh to keep from crying!)
- Previous Writing: My other website, under my real name (Charish Halliburton), is The Motley News. There I write about feminism, race, travel, and politics!
- Upcoming Releases: An Irish Love story entitled, The Write Escape! It’s coming out September 2019 with Carina Press. It’s basically Runaway Bride x Leap Year x Eat, Pray, Love but with a cute black heroine! When you and your mom read it together, please let me know what you think!
Okay, now that the basics are out of the way, PROBING NUGGETS!
What is your favorite childhood book?
The Madeline series. She was one bitch who didn’t fall in line and I loved her for it.
When did you start writing?
Look, I’m not a prodigy who wrote her first book at 7. I started writing at age 16. It was really angsty shit that I forced my friends to read. Vampires, dangerous kissing, and doing stuff over the clothes. My first novel read suspiciously like the 90’s Mummy film starring the incomparable Brendan Fraser. My friend, god bless her judgement, told me to scrap it.
Yes! A thousand times YES!
What are your hopes and dreams?
- I want visit a public library where my book is shelved. I also want to convince a sixteen-year-old girl to read my book. She’s going to be nervous, I’m sure of it. But I’m going to flip to the author photo and assure her it’s really me.
- I want to meet Oprah and hold hands with her, like double clutched hands over our heads in the same manner she does with all of her Super Soul Sunday guests. I want us to wear matching pashminas and jeggings as well.
- I want my husband and I to retire to a cottage somewhere in West Ireland where he can herd sheep and I can face the Atlantic Ocean while I write.
Okay, if you like the person who I’ve introduce, EXCELLENT! Please stick around and we’ll talk about other stuff!
If the jeggings thing turned you off, I’m so sorry.
But you know what? If you’re going to be super judgey about it, maybe this isn’t going to work? As a woman who used to want a Teddy Ruxpin as a child, I am far too old to to be something I’m not. You can either take me AND the jeggings, or you can kick rocks.
I love you, BYYEEE!!
2 thoughts on “Argh! Introductions are the WORST!”
You had me at “Sexy Nerd Romance.”
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Whew! Okay, we’re good to go then, lol!